Saturday, November 10, 2012

a little update on our family...

The last month has been insane in our house.  We have gone through more changes than I can begin to describe in a blog post.  Some of those changes are to be shared at a later date, but I can tell you a bit about our new friends living with us.

On the eve of E's birthday, we added 2 foster friends to our family.  Two sweet boys came to us with 2 hours notice... broken, scared, shaking, crying, wrecked.  In turn, we have felt those same emotions.  We have journeyed with them into a new territory- all of us feeling our way through the transition.  E has learned how to be a Big Sister in a crash course, and we have rapidly learned how to parent 3 children- 2 of them being boys. 

We have felt the prayers, encouragement, and help of our Village in new ways.  Friends have arrived bringing meals, clean laundry, coffee, hugs, tears, lawn mowers, bookshelves, clothes... we are grateful and overwhelmed.  We have come to depend on others hugely in the last year, and never more so than these last 4 weeks.  I have sent more emails with the subject line "Help?" only to be amazed with immediate response.  We. Are. Blessed.

We are also weary.  We have had multiple people gently ask "are you sure now is the right time for these additions?"  And we hear you.  We have asked our selves the same thing- and asked Our Jesus- and we understand that yes, this is the right time.  It is hard.  It is exhausting.  But it is our calling, and so we are responding.

As I've mentioned before, we can't tell you much about our new friends... we tend to call them Big Man and Little Man around here, and for the sake of this blog I will refer to them in the same way.  They are both precious and constant reminders of God's Grace.  We are praying for healing for their family, and we are thankful for the role we get to play in their story.

As many of you have asked about E, I will tell you some about her.  She has cried a lot.  She has missed being an only child.  She is overwhelmed with the volume of boys around here.  She is learning a new routine.  She is learning a new family.

But she is good.  Good.  In the newness, God is shaping something beautiful in her.  And I'll tell you, people... it's not that I am trying to paint a pretty picture of all of this.  I could honestly tell you endless stories of her on the hard-side of this transition.  But last night as Big Man had a pretty severe meltdown, I watched my daughter stand back and hurt for him.  She "gets" it.  She may not like every minute of it, but she is learning to adjust to the calling on our family.

Yesterday we were fortunate to have some intentional alone time with her.  I was able to go to her school for lunch, and then Dan and I got to take her out last night while the boys had an activity at their school.  While we were out on our date with her, we went to an indoor playground for a bit.  2 girls there were not being super nice to her- I sat back and watched E try to approach them only to be told "You can't play here.  This is our space."  And in a moment of true beauty, I watched her say "Well, what are you playing?  Could I play with you?"  They included her in their game of chase... and she ran and giggled and enjoyed being a kid.

Indulge me for just a moment to fully describe that scene: E was surrounded by children who looked very different from her.  She was the only blond, blue eyed, white girl present.  As she ran around with children of varying shades of beautiful skin, I sat watching all their ethnicities blend together in a blur when they would dart by us.  The only little boy playing with them- the one the were running from as he chased them, giggling- was about 2.  He was a lovely child- and only took a break from chasing the girls to stop to sign to his dad.  His dad was deaf- as was the woman he was with- and we weren't certain about the little boy.  I sat and watched the children- different as God has made them all- and enjoyed seeing my beautiful girl in the middle of it all.

Moments like that make me long to share my parenting-joy with my parents... and specifically last night, with Mary.  Today marks the second anniversary of when Mary went to be with Jesus.  Two years.  TWO YEARS.  I cannot believe it...  So much has happened in those two years.  I know Mary would have loved to watch E hang out with those children last night.  I know she would love to watch her here with these boys.  There are so many moments with the boys I know that she and Daddy would have the perfect one-liners to fit our days.  No matter how much I miss each of them daily, I know we are making them proud by loving others like they did.

And there you have it... a glimpse of where we are.  We are grief-stricken, pained, weary, exhausted, sick, broken people.  And yet we are joy-filled, hopeful, encouraged, supported, thankful, grateful people.  The dance of emotions leaves our head spinning.  When you couple that with our ever growing to-do lists, we never seem to stop these days.  Welcome to our drama... we'd love to have you join us on our journey.                                                                       


Abigail said...

Love it and love you!

Rutledge 7 said...

wow, if you aren't stretched, you don't grow! you guys are awesome!

tuttle4 said...

Becky, I can't wait for you to write a book. Maybe many books. You are a gifted writer. Your latest experiences are full of deep, deep "stuff." You are and will be my favorite author.