it's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday...

This morning, I was on the folding-end of a laundry blessing.

My heart-sister, Laurie, called early on and said she needed help at the laundromat.  She was getting the last of her laundry done before leaving town.  Her day was scheduled to the minute, and she needed someone to take over so she could get back on task.  As soon as E's bus left, I headed over to feed quarters and match socks.  Mind you, she's not "leaving town" like, I dunno, going on vacation.  She's "leaving town", like, moving to Arizona.  To plant a church.  Which is awesome... and yet still, my heart hurts.

While I was folding the cutest little Lego underwear, my heart jumped when I realized that I was, indeed, on the giving end of this blessing...

And just a few short weeks ago, I was on the receiving end... our friends had before rushed to our door to take away our dirty laundry and returned it clean and folded.  Blessings.

⁴² They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. ⁴³ Everyone was filled with awe at the many wonders and signs performed by the apostles.⁴⁴ All the believers were together and had everything in common. ⁴⁵ They sold property and possessions to give to anyone who had need. ⁴⁶ Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts,⁴⁷ praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved.  Acts 2:42-47

This is just how my 10-year friendship with Laurie and her family has been.  We have given- and received- together when there was a need.  We have seen signs and wonders.  We have broken bread and prayed.  And we have had everything in common... sometimes, a wee bit too much.  (There aren't many people who would loan you ALL of their clothes when your luggage gets lost in Rwanda... just sayin'.)

Which is part of what makes this transition so hard.  Never have I felt so instantly connected to a friend in both life and Spirit.  Never have I had someone who would drop everything to run to Wal-mart at a moment's notice.  Never have I been rebuked in love and encouraged in truth and ridiculed by the same person.  We have woven together a tapestry of pain and suffering... joy and celebration.  We have witnessed the birth, rebirth, and homecoming of our children together... we have taken pregnancy tests and watched fertility ultrasounds together... we have watched great men be inaugurated and sung on the stage with other men at that same moment in time.  We have walked together in search of a nude beach... we have wept openly about our pasts... we have bought each other Starbucks when the other one of us just couldn't afford it.  We have lived through parents with cancer and dementia... we have sung RENT! at the top of our lungs (even when we have the words wrong.)  We have walked on dark streets in a foreign land against our better judgement... and been blown away at God's individual love over a gallon of wine.  We have been sure our husbands have lost their minds and needed us to tell them... and praised those same men at their amazing growth and Godly decisions.  We have watched college students grow... and watched our hearts grow to love students more every day.  We have run together at Rope Drop and run together at the Y in the dark.  We have eaten at Long John Silvers and Boca de Bobbidi Boo.  And never have I been more grateful for every step of the journey.

THIS is the body of Christ.  This is the fellowship of believers.  This is the good life. This is the real life- folding laundry and all.  And this is truth... friends really are friends forever.  God speed, my Kindred Spirit.  I can't wait to see where He leads us next.

 (she is a Brickhouse, you know...)

In addition to laundry...

... I've been doing tons of other stuff lately.  I've been so "full", it's been hard to find time to blog.  One of the neatest things of late is seeing how God is moving in regards to our Fostering.  We told Elizabeth a few weeks back about our big plans (so, yes, it's now public knowledge) and she was super excited.  She, like her Momma, gets a bit emotional and cried when we talked about it.  Love that child.

Like any "big" thing that happens in life, I think when you enter a new realm, you suddenly are thrown together with others who are in the same boat, or at least others who know that boat well.  We found it true with infertility: the minute we told people our story, they connected us to others walking that same road.  Same with miscarriage.  Same with debt (when people were willing to talk about it!).  Same with what I'm seeing of my friends adopting.  And now, same with our foster situation.

I remember those well intentioned people who offered "advice" or "their story" when it did nothing but jack up my insecure heart.  However, God is doing a huge work in the area of security in my life (more on that later... like, a day when I don't post 4673084763 other things), and now when those people show up, it either makes me sad or frustrated for them... but not bitter or sad for me.  It's a good spot to be in.

I can't even begin to count the funny responses we've gotten about fostering.  "Do you know that the kids will be in bad shape?" (umm....)  "They could be abused!" (gasp!)  "Please don't tell me you're going through DSS."  (okay, I'll keep that to myself.)

Then, in the midst of those dark moments, God blesses my heart by sending someone that is a "perfect fit".  At a party a few weeks back I shared with a woman I'd just met about our call to foster.  She said, "Oh, do you know Meredith ___?  She and her husband are getting ready to foster, too" I said no, but within 2 hours of being home, I'd "found" Meredith on Facebook, messaged her, she'd sent me her blog post about how they got to the place of fostering, we'd messaged back and forth about getting together, and 36 hours later we had a blind date playdate.  Complete with both of our miracle daughters (and her 2 other kids... and another friend and her kids...) who are both 4 and both named Elizabeth.  God's funny like that.

We shared our seemingly identical stories with each other about our call to foster and laughed at all we had in common.  Since then, she came to the Williamseses' Biggest Baddest Yard Sale Ever with her BFF.... who had "randomly"' met my BFF at an adoption conference back in February.  God's funny like that, too.

All in all, it's fun to have a new friend.  And one that gets what we went through to get to where we are.  And one who is sharing this same season of life that we are.  And one who understands that even when people seem to want to discourage us from doing what we know God wants us to do... sometimes He'll send us a fellow journeyer to share the load.

me, our shared friend, and my new friend- Meredith

My Girl Likes to Party All The Time...

E had her first sleepover last night with her buddy, Ella.  E has been asking for a sleepover forever, and we offered this one as a "help" to Ella's mom who has a one-month old at home (and a 2-year-old... but we weren't so much help there...), but let's be real... this was more to "help" Elizabeth.

The girls were hysterical.  They played while we got dinner ready, played after dinner, gave us a fashion show, watched half of a movie and went to bed just when I told them to.  Then, 2 hours later after loads of giggles, I laid down on E's bed with her to help them calm down a bit- and within 5 minutes they were asleep (and I was out in 10... then I moved to my own bed.)  This morning, they came- full speed, full volume- into our bedroom to let me know that they'd heard a noise downstairs and went to investigate but when they got there realized that no one was there and that we'd just left on a lamp and did we not know that leaving on a lamp means wasting energy.  (Whew.)  I apologized for my energy wasting, groggily stumbled downstairs to press "play" on the paused DVD, and fumbled my way to the coffee pot.  (Thank you, Jesus, for reminding me to buy coffee yesterday while I was in Target.)

We've got a full morning ahead, but the overnight part?  Total success.  And the girls' behavior?  Success.

I pray for Elizabeth's friendships on a regular basis.  I pray that she would make good choices in those friendships- that she would associate with people who will build her up and not tear her down.  I remember too vividly what hard moments I had in friendships (and sometimes still have, to be honest) and I want her to be surrounded to people who bring out the best in her, and vice versa.

If last night is any indication, it's never too early to pray this... because God blessed their time together in big ways.  And let's not lie- these two have loved each other like siblings for their entire little lives... sometimes not being as kind to each other as necessary.  But last night they were so excited to be in each other's presence that none of that mattered... they just loved each other.

It may take me 14 days to get our house put back together, but I think it's all worth it... and I'm looking forward to this being the first of many sleepovers.  If only I could bottle up all these giggles for a rainy day....

Becky Camp

There's been some buzz on Facebook in the last 24 hours about "Becky Camp"... let me tell you my version.

As school ended last year, I asked Elizabeth what one thing she wanted to do over the summer.  She said she wanted to "have camp".  I, wrongly, thought she wanted to camp in the backyard... but, no, my social child wanted to HOST a CAMP.  So we did.  We invited several of her friends, picked a few dates over the summer,  and picked a name- Camp of Kids... and a tradition was born.  (She asked me just this last week what crafts we were doing *this* summer at Camp of Kids.)

As the moms came to pick up their kids, there was a common outcry... "Why don't you do a camp for *us*?"

So I did.

This weekend, I hosted the (first annual?) Camp of Y'all.  Not Camp of Moms, and not Camp of Women... but Camp of, well, Y'all.  (Which, over FB, became renamed Camp Becky or Becky Camp... funny.)

Sidenote: Recently, I had a wine tasting party.  (Stay with me, this relates.)  I did an invitation on Facebook and started clicking names of people I thought would enjoy it.  When I got to the number "76", I realized that was a bit ridiculous for a wine tasting party... so I narrowed it down to only inviting about 40.  Seriously.  As I was crafting my invitation list for Camp of Y'all, I could not invite everyone I know... nor could I even invite everyone I wanted to.  If you were not included, please do not see this as a reflection of our friendship.  Also, you could see it as a reflection of your email not "liking" Evite... like my friend Nicole... who was invited, but never got the invitation.  Who knows.

Saturday morning, my house was full of 20-ish beautiful women.  We had breakfast.  Including mimosas and 4 pots of coffee.

 Thank you, Kristina, for these amazing cinnamon rolls!

Wouldn't you know the one thing we ran "low" on was fruit?  Buncha girls...

Next, we did some ice breakers.  And we made some crafts.

What's a camp without Mod Podge?

one of the cute magnets...

One of the "stations" the ladies had to do was writing a letter to themselves.  I always loved/hated this activity back in youth group/student council days.  Now as I'm older and see how quickly time flies and things change, I relish it.

Before lunch, we played "telephone-pictionary".  I may have laughed so hard at one I almost wet my pants.  I freakin' love that game.

this one was something about Becky going to Las Vegas and throwing up then playing craps

I have no idea what this was.

Lunch was incredibly yummy... tasty salads and, of course, some chocolate.  Thank you, Lisa, for your recipes!  Your salted caramel brownie bites were a hit... and I adore the chocolate dipped clementines! 

My favorite part of the day, however, was right at the beginning when my friends shared their "words".  I heard a great message on January 2 this year about picking a word for yourself this year and praying it over your entire year.  I'd emailed the ladies coming and asked them to send me their words... as we did our first ice breaker, each woman shared their word.  The beauty of a group like this is that we all fit into each other's words on some level... as we shared our words (and shared why we picked them), several of us nodded or uh-huhed our shared experiences.  We talked about:

- The desire to be more organized.

- The desire to be more intentional about enjoying the place we are in right now with our lives.

- The desire to complete projects instead of starting numerous ones and leaving them undone.

- The desire to be a blessing to others.

Just to name a few...

My morning was filled with joy, laughter, and being content.  I am blessed to know such neat women.  Now I will say this... I appreciated all of your shout-outs and thank yous via Facebook... but that's not why I did it.  I have an amazingly supportive husband who understands my love language and encourages me to love other people the way I want to be loved.  And I have an amazing God who wants me to live in community and be transparent.  So while I appreciate your gratitude, I don't need it.  Just feel loved... and pay it forward.

photos courtesy of Tamar Petty

photos uploaded to her computer and shared at an amazingly rapid rate courtesy of The Jett

My senses have become heightened.

I talked with one of my favorite friends ever last night.  Not only does he have the best voice in the world (and come on, anyone who lived with me during answering machine days have to admit they sometimes would play his messages again just to hear him speak), but Eric Farmer has the best "phrasing" as well.

Last night when we spoke, he was putting words around a concept I'd yet to phrase.  He said that in his world, his senses had become heightened and that the same-old-things looked brand new to him.  Thank you, Eric, for explaining in words what is going on in my heart.

Since our Disney trip, we've come home to discover a new world.  Dan and I both have experienced God's presence in new ways in our individual lives and in our marriage, and I cannot express to you how He has heightened our senses.  My overwhelming schedule has been just as busy, but calm.  My chaotic closet is still just as jumbled, but appears manageable.  My huge fear of running is just as present, but I am no where near as skeptical of my ability... and one might say I'm even excited about seeing what I'll be able to accomplish.

My senses are heightened... the friends who joined me for dinner tonight (who were some of the very first friends I met here nearly 9 years ago) were "new" to me- and that's a beautiful thing.  It's a joy and a privilege to see how God blesses and renews friendships... as well as how He protects them along the way.  One year ago, my Daddy called me with a grim update about Mary's health.  These same women sat in my house and supported me as I wept.  Tonight they sat with me as I cried with an overwhelmed heart about what God is doing in our lives.  For that, I am thankful.  

The same-old-things look new... here's hoping you'll check them out with me...

Growing Up.

Twice this week I've had people tell me I'm "growing up".  In a good way.

The most recent "growing up" moment was tonight before I went to hang out with some cool ladies and paint pottery.  I came downstairs and said to Dan, "I look different than I've ever looked before.  I'm not in any way claiming to be trendy, funky, or anything of the sort... but I feel like I look more like myself than I've ever looked, and I'm not sure why that is."  Dan said, "It's not because of your fun hair, or because of your fun new bling... it's because you are growing up, and you're comfortable in your own skin."

True.

So in the midst of my growing up-ness, let it be known that I am not totally grown up.  I still giggled in a horribly inappropriate way tonight with one of my favorite girls about the offensive-ness of my initials.

But I am grown up enough to appreciate that spending a Friday night with women from all stages of life is just as much fun as getting cute to go to Frat Court... and here's some proof of my good time:

 one of my favorite sights...

 peace.

 pigs.

 our birthday girl friend!

some of the best ladies I know... 

Besties.

Yesterday, Elizabeth told me she had more best friends than I do.

I beg to differ.

At the end of her "list", she started naming babysitters, baby sisters, and mommas of her friends.  While I might say she was stretching it, she may have, um, learned that from me.

She may just have learned that loads of different people can be your "best" friend.

I talked before about the differences I see in my "best friends".  In elementary school, I was BFFs with whoever was in my class.  In middle school, it was a lot based on classes as well, but we had a little more flexibility.  Then high school, and everyone was fair game.  College?  Piece of cake.  Here's my problem: I keep picking up new best friends and not letting any of the old ones go.  (Dan always jokes that I don't let anyone leave my life.  Bag my groceries at Food Lion?  I'll send you a Christmas card..)

Tonight, in fact, 2 of my best friends called me out on Facebook when I posted that I was making dinner for 4 of my best friends... saying that they'd not been invited.  Confusing, isn't it?

The friends- my besties- who I celebrated tonight are unique.  I referenced them in the Community post before.  These are the ladies who I share my life with.  We decided 2 years ago to meet weekly for Bible study, accountability, and fellowship.  We have been together through major and minor life ordeals: ambulance calls, trips to nudie beaches, whatever.  We've celebrated 2 years of birthdays together- each one of us getting our own special day to feel, well, special.  We've gone out for fondue, attempted to get tattoos, had pretend-spa activities, gone to musicals... 10 separate events of fun, fun, fun.

This year, however, we've decided to reign in the Birthday Wagon.  We started a new tradition... one which I would gladly share with any of my other besties.  We decided rather than spend lots of time, energy, and money to celebrate each one of us- which, let's be honest, we all deserve given that we are spectacular- we would spend time blessing each other.

And that's what we did.

We started the year of birthdays with Lesley's, which was back in October, but the last month has been so nutso for me that we've been unable to get together until now.  We had a yummy dinner complete with some of Les's favorite foods.  Then, we each went around and "blessed" Lesley by telling her what it is about her we love and respect.  Well, in theory we did that.  What actually happened was we had Laurie read what we'd written, but it worked anyway.  We were present as Lesley was praised for they way she is an amazing mother, an amazing pray-er, an amazing friend... wait... strike that.  We were present as God was praised for the way He has made Lesley.  It was a beautiful thing, and we are all blessed to know her.

In addition to that, we laughed at old videos, told stories from our Thanksgivings, laughed about turkeys, loved on my new dog, and enjoyed being together.

What a beautiful thing.

As I was preparing what I was going to "say" about Lesley, I told Dan that I hope one day to be the kind of person that someone would be able to say those same things about me.   That's when I realized that I guess my Mom was right: "You're known by the company you keep."  Which makes me thankful for these 4 besties, and all the rest of the BFFs I've picked up along the way.

By the company I keep, I'd say I'm doing just fine.

Hopefully one day all of their your super qualities will rub off on me.  Hopefully one day I will become the amazing person that many of you are.  For now, I'll enjoy time with you- be it in person playing Bunko, playing with our children, praying, or having coffee- or virtually via FB and email.  I'll see the good things in you and hope to become cool like you.  Or,  I'll just enjoy your coolness... because it's a blessing to know you.

Want to be my new best friend?

Play-by-play of our days... complete with pictures (and a question.)

Monday I was in such a pissy mood, I cancelled a friend coming over.  I barked at Dan and Elizabeth.  I couldn't see my way out of my frustration... tears interspersed with anger.  But I took this picture:

because it made me happy.  I liked the peaceful way the orzo looked as it was boiling.  That was about the only peaceful thing around these parts on Monday.

Tuesday was tons, tons, tons better.  E and I went to church that morning (we needed a change in scenery and decided to crash the Bible Study) after stopping by Starbucks to get a pumpkin spice latte.

Before the study began, my tears came back.  "Faithful Harmony" (a group of girls from my church who sing at various events) busted out with this:

(my apologies for the crappy camera work.  I couldn't get up, so I propped the camera up on my pumpkin spice latte.)

"It Is Well" kinda messes me up these days, and I think it always will.  It's what Mary (my stepmom) has been clinging to as she's fought cancer all these years.  Hearing the words "... though trials should come, let this blessed assurance control: that Christ has regarded my helpless estate and has shed His own blood for my soul" reminded me what a jerkface I'd been the day before getting caught up in my own stuff.  Mary has shown such courage and strength in all these years- but most especially in the recent days- and I can't believe I'd let my own junk overshadow the blessed assurance that *can* control me when I let it.

I had the treat of getting my house ready alone (thanks, La!) and then with a friend (thanks, Leigh!) for Bunko.  We hosted this same time last year and realized how much fun (and how easy) caramel apples are to make, so we did it again.  Good times.

Wednesday was nutso busy, but all good things.  Coffee (pumpkin spice latte, again!) with a friend, E having a friend come over after school:

(E was in the "hospital" here, Becca came to visit.)  Then after taking Becca home we went to the Fair.  Good times, funnel cakes (hi, last post!), and sketchy rides... you can't beat it.

 Can you see how fun this ride is?  But look at what's under it:

 Yep. I always feel better knowing I'm riding around over the sledge hammer.  And a bottle of water.

 A little spooked by Smokey Bear.

 Gaby's Bird!!

 Dan's 12 Year Old Moment of the Fair (this year.)  "Please do not handle displays... under melons... get it?!?!?!?" (Dying laughing.)

Loving feeding the animals... especially the Llama Llama Red Pajama, as she kept calling him.  (Hint: anyone need a birthday idea for E?  We don't own that book... but she has it on her "favorites" list, thanks Ms. Fallanca!)

After a good night's sleep, we went to MOMS at church this morning (and TOTALLY enjoyed Angie sharing!), then off to Tanglewood to feed the ducks.  (Shhh... the sign only says don't feed the GEESE.  We took it literally.)

 E said this duck was the Mommy Duck.  I asked her how she knew and she said because this duck made all the rules.  (Read: Bossy Duck.)

We came home and I was frustrated to find that I'd screwed something up at our house... but God already quickly took my screw up to give me something better.  I'm bothered that I allowed myself to get worked up over something so little once again... but thankful that it's a non-issue at this point and I'm re-grounded.

While at the park today we met the nicest family.  She told me her name (and her kids names) and E has been asking if we can see them again.  So, Blog Family, I ask you... is it weird to find her on Facebook and ask her to be my friend?  (I know, this seems like something I'd *totally* normally do... but I want some Blog advice this time.)

Comments welcome....

More thoughts on what this week meant later (this was the week- six years ago- that I had my last miscarriage.)  For now, I'll just look for beauty in boiling pasta, apple sticks, laughing girls, and bossy ducks.  That's how we Momma Ducks roll.

Community

(Warning, long post ahead.)

I have lots of friends.  I'm not going to lie.  I do.  Currently, 1397 on Facebook (oohh!!! I've been defriended recently!  Last week it was over 1400!  Sorry to whomever I pissed off...) but that's not a fair assessment of what my friend-life is really like.  (And I'd like to take this opportunity to tell all you haters to back off.  YES, I'm aware I have lots of FB friends.  No, I don't keep up with all of them every day.  But when you add years of Student Council, church camp, HS friends, college friends, and 12 years of ministry?  You get to know a lot of people.  Back off.)  I am surrounded by people who love (tolerate?) me and whom I love.

But I often feel lonely.

Yep.

It's hard for someone as social as I am to talk about feeling lonely because it looks like it goes against the obvious.  It totally happens.  All these 1397 "friends"... and I desire to feel connected.

Since the early 80s when I walked the tightrope of Elementary School "Best Friendships" I've been aware of it.  "You were my best friend, but now Mandy is."  I remember entering Middle School and being told that I'd "stolen" someone's best friend away from them.  Add the glory of these:

... and what was a girl to do but want to be someone's "Be Fri" or "St End"?

I've always had multiple "best friends"... in high school I had my "school" best friend and then my "church" best friend.  As I've gotten older I use the term more liberally.  I have 4 "best friends" I went to the beach with last week.  I have my high school "best friends" I see on a regular basis.  I have my college "best friend" who is the only one allowed to bring up the time I cut my bangs before a fake-date with a boy I really liked.

For all those "best" friendships... I am thankful.

But often, I see the world's version of intimacy between friends, and I start to second guess my standing with these women.  Jacked up, I know, but it's there.  I get jealous of people who get to have regular dates with my gal-pals who are far away.  I get jealous of people who get to take big trips with my gal-pals while I sit at home watching PBS-Kids.  I get jealous of hearing about times I've missed out on, or connectedness that I've not felt.

Because I am twelve.

I know all the things I *should* feel and think about friendships... I get it, people, I promise.  But sometimes my heart feels differently than my head tells it that it should.

That is when I make the choice for community.  A wise man once told me that we all desire to know and be known, love and be loved, celebrate and be celebrated, and serve and be served.  Here are some of the places I've decided to do all of those things:

* I am involved at my daughter's preschool with the parent's group.  It has allowed me to connect with people I would not otherwise know- we don't all live near each other, we don't share a common background, but we share a present- young children- and I dig them.  Another day we can talk about how I felt like I didn't fit in when I started said preschool, but I digress...

* I am involved with a MOMS group at my church.  I will confess that every Thursday when I go it's not always life-changing.  (Especially that teacher from last January who taught "Search for Significance"... zeesh, she talked a LOT.)  Sometimes I end up daydreaming about my to-do list or checking out Bobbi's shoes (always so cute.)  But I've made a commitment to be there, to get to know new people (and yes, that often means sitting at a table with people I don't know), and being a part of a shared experience.

* Dan and I are part of a Small Group Bible Study on Wednesday nights.  Currently our "small" group is not so small... we have over 10 couples.  But we make a choice to be authentic with these people.  Our sharing with them involves the basic (What does the Bible say about that?) to the complex (How I need help in this area of my life.)  This past week I shared with the women my financial frustrations... it allowed me to feel relief after saying it, I know I'm covered in prayer, and now I have a group to share the blessings of how God has provided this week with a new car and Pumpkin Spice Lattes.  I will say this about Small Groups: I've been in several in our 7.5 years at ROCC, and a few at HillSong before that.  You are not guaranteed to "click" with every group you are in... you are not guaranteed "best friendships"... but you do get out of them what you put in.  I feel like for this season we have a really connected group already (3 weeks in!)... and that's because I get the sense that people are willing to share life together.

* We lead the college ministry at our church.  And we. Freakin'. Love. It.  God called me to college ministry about 10 years ago... and what a ride it's been.  It's a neat thing to live life with people that are, well, younger than we are... but that allow us to be part of their lives.  We tell them our "real" stuff, and they do the same.

* Weekly, I'm part of a group of 5 women who meet together to study, pray, live life, and maybe go to Nudist Beaches together.  This one is one of the neatest parts of my life. (Not the nudie part, but...)  Two years ago, 2 of the 5 of us were talking about needing a place to feel connected.  We talked about who might benefit from that same sort of group and we... well... just asked them to be our friends.  We called each of them and said "I know your life is busy right now, but this feels like what we are missing in our lives, and maybe you'd like it, too?"  And, amazingly, they all said yes.  We've had a connection that's unreal given that we didn't know each other that well 2 years ago.  Since that time we've seen our group through 2 surgeries, multiple family members with cancer, several health scares, parenting issues, marital issues, financial issues, and... FUN.  Lots and lots of fun.  Because we made a commitment to be real with each other.

All kinds of different community in my life.  Some people I know in-and-out, some I just say hi to in passing, but lots of people that I have chosen to be real with- and it's made all the difference.  Add that in with neighbors I am blessed to share my home and neighborhood with, a Bunko group I've played with for over 8 years, a Supper Club that gathers monthly for a couple years now, a new Book Club... I am surrounded by community.  But it only exists when I let it.  It only exists when I choose to be real with people.  I only get out of it when I put in.  Without opening my life to people, I just have a very busy schedule.  But when I allow them in and allow myself to be real, I am part of something greater than myself.

Don't have that kind of connection with people?  No worries, it's not for everyone.  In fact, even reading all I've written about makes me introvert side start wheezing.  (Yes, I have one.)  But if you are desiring that kind of connection... make the first step.  Join a Small Group.  Find people you like and ask them to get together with you regularly.  Find a Book Club.  Send an email, make a call... it's that easy.  You may have success and instant connection, or you may have to try again later.  

It's part of the bigger plan for our lives... and it's worth every effort.

It's hard to feel lonely after all.

Why I Am Inappropriate.... (and we have a winner)

First things first... to those of you how commented on (and decided to "follow" my blog!), gracias.  Your stories were quite entertaining.  I wrote all of your precious names on pieces of paper and scientifically drew a winner.  Lindsay, you are the proud new owner of a purple tie-dyed beer coozie and a pretty white sand dollar.  I hope it didn't break in my bag.

Now on to the story....

So, last year when the five of us went to the beach for our First Annual Beach Weekend, we had a rockin' good time and had hilarious stories.  In fact, some were so funny that while I was on the phone this week someone said "after LAST year's stories, I can't WAIT to hear this year's."  And, to be honest, I didn't think it was possible to top those stories, but I am always up for a challenge.

Then we topped them.

By going to a nudist beach.

Yep.

Swear.

To make a very long (and quite hysterical) story moderately short, I'll break it down like this:  2 of the girls went for a looooooooooong walk on Saturday (all the way to South Carolina!) and stumbled upon this gem-mine of a NC Treat.  Apparently at the end of the NC Coast, there is an un-official "natural" beach.  It's a bird reserve... and a place for naked people to get, well, naked.

They were just strolling along and spotted this guy in tighty-whities.  Weird, righ?  Weirder was that he went to a MAILBOX on the freakin' beach and got something out.  They were a little concerned if they checked out said mailbox, they would unofficially be inviting themselves to a party they weren't ready to attend.  So they kept walking.  And saw ANOTHER tighty-whitey guy.  And a Speedo guy.  Oh, and 4 NAKED people.  Yep.

All along these very well behaved women were freaking out (to each other, not making a spectacle) when they said to each other, "we are SO glad Becky wasn't with us."

Why?

Because I AM INAPPROPRIATE.

(Some of you have heard me tell the story of wanting to be known as "Inappropriate Becky" and how unbeknown-st to me, I already am that girl.)

So those 2 non-inappropriate girls (or, I guess, appropriate) came back to the others of us and shared this story.  What was an inappropriate girl like me supposed to do?

Go back the next day

With my camera.

Sunday morning after our fair share of coffee and cinnamon rolls, here we go:

We start walking down the beach and it looks like there are no views to be viewed.  Then these guys show up behind us.  I very stealth-ly snapped some pics of them.  Yes, dude in the black bottoms?  That's his cover-up.  You are getting just a glimpse of his real suit... a neon green thong

Because I am the funniest person I know, I cracked myself up with trying to get "fake" pictures where it looked like those guys were trying to hold my friend's hand (as they were walking ahead of us and not yet aware of the guys getting ready to pass them.)  I laughed until I wheezed.

Then a guy in boxer shorts walks past us and stops to chat.  Cause, you know, it's normal for me to talk to a stranger in his boxers on a Sunday morning.  We got to the end and turned to come on back.  Well, 3 of us did.  We flagged down our other 2 friends who were well ahead to let them know we'd be at the mailbox (later post to come)... as I turned back around to see if Boxer Shorts guy had stopped to talk to them, I realized Boxer Shorts guy was now Naked Guy.  And Black Cover-Up guy had removed said Cover-Up... and now was in his thong checking out Naked Guy.

Can't get a clear picture of what I mean?  Don't worry, because I am inappropriate I cropped it for you:

Yep.

Sadly, because apparently NC has Blue Laws on nudie beaches too, we didn't see a ton more.  I mean, don't get me wrong, Green Thong guy took said thong off at some point, but I was too far away and didn't have my zoom lens to prove it.  And it started raining, which seemed to scare away some sun bathers.

All in all, that was an experience I will never forget (and don't need to repeat)... and it solidified my role as "Inappropriate Becky".  My favorite viral video these days is this one by Will.i.am... maybe he'll remake it for me and add "What I am is... inappropriate"... until then, I'll just bring my camera and document life on my own.

I'm still laughing about it all....